


Catch a Constellation

by orphan_account



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Angst, Declarations Of Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-20
Updated: 2014-10-20
Packaged: 2018-02-21 22:15:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2484266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim finds his heart amongst the stars.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Catch a Constellation

**Author's Note:**

> Jim and Spock under the stars, as prompted by plaidshirtjimkirk
> 
> holy shit, read by same plaid captain at [tumblr](http://plaidshirtjimkirk.tumblr.com/post/108605903831/catch-a-constellation-by-artlesstumbles-i-love)
> 
> Thank you for five thousand years!!!!

When Jim Kirk was a boy, he liked to sit on his grandparent's roof at night and watch the sky. It didn't matter if it was cold or hot; wind or rain falling on his bare arms. The moment the sun went down, he was there, chin tilted toward the sky, waiting for that first prick of light to mar the darkness.

One by one those stars mapped the sky, marching into place as though he commanded them himself. And as he watched them, he promised himself he would be out there, amongst those lights one day. And he would find new stars, stars that no one has yet seen. And he would be free.

—-

There was a time, full of loneliness and pain; when Jim Kirk no longer sat on that roof. When he visited a new world, a world where he would learn the meaning of loss, and of want. Where he would watch an entire colony burn to the ground.

He was one of the few survivors, one of the only ones who saw the face of the man who tried to destroy them all. And he would dream of them sometimes, when it was over, when it was through. When he was curled up in his bed at night, back home on Earth.

He wakes up shivering, crying out for people who no longer live. And he sees the stars outside his window and he wants them more than ever. To patrol those stars and make sure that nothing like that ever happens again.

—-

He makes it to the stars again one day, and it is during a landing party, separated from most of the others, that he understands what loss really is.

His first officer is dying, losing blood while Jim kneels helplessly beside him. There is nothing he can do, nothing he can offer except his presence; his love.

And so he takes his first officer's hand, and holds it between his own, and just hopes that Spock understands. Spock blinks up at him, his lips broken and bloodied. There is a gash down the side of his face.

"Jim…" he whispers, the single word brushed away on the wind. Jim grips his hand tighter and lets the tears fall.

—-

He hasn't been on this roof in many years, so long since he's watched the stars cut through the velvet dark. They don't look the same.

They're brighter, but they no longer call his name.

He has what he needs right here.

"Jim?"

Jim looks over at his first officer, at the dark sweater he consented to wear—the wool cap that covers his sensitive ears. Even though it's summer here. He's still recovering.

Jim takes up his hand, holds it carefully between his own; and smiles. "I was just thinking about the first time I sat out here," he explains because he can sense his new bondmate's worry through their fledgeling link. "When I was a kid."

"It isn't a happy memory?"

"No, it is." Jim pets his hand. "But it was lonely. I was looking for something." He twines their fingers. "It's not lonely anymore."

Spock's eyes glint in the darkness, reflecting the light from the stars. A constellation all their own. And Jim doesn't need any others.


End file.
